I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
