wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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