Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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