Non-Jews are for practice
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
