this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
