Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Randomize
