So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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