i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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