I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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