So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
