that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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