I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
