I want to make a zoo with you.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
