He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
