so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
not ubering you a puppy
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize
