Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
