Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
