That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
