Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
