i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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