I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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