Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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