I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
