she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
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