I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Randomize
