i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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