before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Randomize
