in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
how do flat chested girls get laid?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
