I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.â€
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