I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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