you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
she peed on how many people?
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
