So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
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