Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
as a side note pls kill me
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
