he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I still have a little drunk in my system
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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