im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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