haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize