used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
