OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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