i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
