No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize
