Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize