I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
