i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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