So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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