"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
I'm having to shit out rocks
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