jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Actions speak louder than pants.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
