And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
