I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
