getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
