is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize
